Hyper-Bole 2010: 1st quarter = feh.

What do Betty White, Abe Vigoda and Jim McMahon have in common?
They’re all at least 25 years past their prime? Yes.
My mom would love to meet all of them? Yes.
They’re all eligible for the senior citizens discount at McDonald’s? Yes.
They’ve still got it? Definitely.
Quick recap of my self-imposed rules for Hyper-Bole:
– Not gonna review movie trailers.
– Not gonna review CBS promos.
– Not gonna touch the Tebow spot.
I can’t guarantee the rest of my fellow Hyper-Bole bloggers will adhere to this stipulations. Just putting you on notice there.
Now that we’ve got that unpleasantness out of the way…my section of Hyper-Bole is gonna be short because the 1st quarter wasn’t much to behold.
There are only two ways advertising can move me: humor or tears. Tell me a story that elicits either response and I’ll at least take a hard look at the product. That being said, only 4 of the 24 ads in the first quarter deserve recognition:
1. Snickers: You can’t pick up a bat and beat a pick-up football game with Rose Nyland and Tessio. I’m allergic to peanuts and I almost sent my husband out for a Snickers for me.
2. Boost Mobile: As a child of the 70s and 80s, I assume this spot is targeted at me. Bullseye. Only one issue – didn’t see Refrigerator Perry. Ditka and his ‘stache compensated well.
3. Doritos: The majority of the Doritos ads (and there were plenty of them) didn’t impress me. I get it – they’re addictive. But, the spot with the kid and his mom’s blind date hurt my side. Maybe it’s a gall bladder or acid reflux problem, but I pretty much tasted Dorito’s after that spot.
4. Bridgestone Tires: Humorous payoff – bachelor party. Tearful payoff – saving the whales. Consider that a touchdown and extra point, rolled into one.
Honorable Mentions: Simpsons Coca-Cola spot and Bud Light T-Pain Autotone spot (only because I love the autotone effect)
Honorable Let’s-Not-Ever-Speak-Of-Them-Agains: GoDaddy (Note to GoDaddy – there ARE women who handle tech too), Monster.com’s animatronic beavers and Doritos’ funeral spot