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There’s an app for THAT?

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With more than 425,000 apps available for download in the iTunes app store, how does one know which are the gems and which are the duds? It’s so irritating when you have thumbed through all the apps available, finally made a decision on which one to purchase, waited for the download, opened the app and realized it was a dud; a complete waste of time, possibly money, and memory space.
This is why it has come to my attention that not only do we need the App Stores’ “TOP 25” category, but we also need a “Worst” category. I have taken it upon myself to go ahead and get this list started with six of the worst apps that have ever made it into Apple’s App Store.
#6  iTan
Users can select how many minutes they would like to “tan” and then hit Start. The screen simulates tanning bulbs and cautions users not to look directly into the light and to use appropriate UV protection. “Whether at work, on the bus or train, you can top up your tan and keep that healthy glow.” Really??  Reviews of this app have actually commented if it really works.
#5  Hold On!
Possibly the most useless app on the list, this app has a button in the center of the screen that you simply see how long you can hold it for.  Still holding?
#4  Hang Time
This app requires users to throw their iPhone in the air and calculates the hang time of the phone using the accelerometer (pending you have actually caught it coming back down). If anyone is paying 99¢ to throw their phone in the air, they need to get their head checked.
#3 I Am Rich
Simply put, this app costs $999.99 to display a glowing red dot on the screen and a pop-up message that declares you are rich. That. Is. All.  The official description read “It’s a work of art with no hidden function at all.” Apple removed this app a little while back after eight users bought it, discovering they were not only rich, but stupid.
#2 Birth Buddy
You can now give birth via your iPhone. Birth Buddy is an app used to help pregnant woman track times between labor contractions. This app just strikes me as weird. Because the first thing I am going to do when going into labor pull out my iPhone.
#1 Baby Shaker
The Baby Shaker app has received national attention when iPhoners protested the app and Apple eventually yanked it out of their store. Baby Shaker displays a drawing of a baby crying on the screen. The only way you can get it to stop crying is to shake the baby, changing the image from a crying baby to a calm one.
“Now, Baby Shaker gives you a charming drawing of a baby sure to make those with a less than iron will fawn. True to life, it begins to annoy you immediately. See how long you can endure his or her adorable cries before you just have to find a way to quiet the baby down!

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Ed Sharp

Ed brings 15 years of traditional and digital media sales experience to the agency, giving us a perspective most agencies don’t have. When he’s not working or seeking new knowledge, Ed hangs out with his wife, two kids, two dogs, one cat, and a hamster. And yes, the cat and hamster are best friends.

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